Classified Ads
Found: Guitar. In rubble at site of new
Whit's End. Six pieces, two strings. Call Pete's Construction Service at
555-6546.
We're Available! We'll be in your corner!
We'll fight for your rights. No cases is too weird. Call Crowe, Jorg, and
Beeboff at 555-8482.
Come to the community meeting to protest
Whit's End Oswald Height s. Keep them out so we can get our community
center! Come Thursday night at 5:00 p.m.
Wanted: Partner to juggle with. Partner who
won't break glass. Call Sarah at 555-8412.
Needed: Ear plugs. For use during Nick
Mulligan's guitar lessons. Call Lisa at 555-5361.
Needed: Guitar lessons. Nick Mulligan. I'm
pretty good, but need some expertise to guide my free artist spirit. Needed:
Guitar lessons. Call Nick at 555-5361.
For Nick Mulligan. He's pretty desperate.
Call Lisa at 555-5361.
Help Wanted. Just 'cause. Found? Unknown
item. Unknown dimensions. Unknown origin. Unknown where found. Call if you
think that it could possibly be yours.
Please sign petition. Rats are moving out of
Oswald Heights. Call 555-7823.
Help Wanted: Assistant for Gantry's Printing
Services. Must be able to typeset and work with graphical layout. Call
555-0010.
Sale on lights. All sizes. Guaranteed to last
longer than the other lights we sell. Come to the Electric Palace TODAY!
Wanted: Partner to baseball with. Partner who
won't break glass. Call Alex at 555-8142. For sale: Piece of glass from
scene of famous Odyssey crime. Call Rodney at 555-8124.
Needed: Models for Virtual Mingle Room. To be
made into wax statues. Don't apply unless you can stand in the same position
for at least eight hours. Call Ricky at 555-NOVA.
Help Wanted: BTV Camera Grip. Needs to know
what a "grip" is. Call Bernard at 555-8772.
Needed: Business to move into Carnegie and
Bristol. Whit's End moved elsewhere. Building still available. Call George
Paxson at 555-2841.
Available: Pete's Construction Service. For
all your building needs. We won't cheat you out of house and home. Call
555-2735.
Needed: Stopwatch. Must have start and stop
buttons clearly intact. Simple to operate, please! Call the Harlequin at
555-4633.
Wanted: Partner to laugh with. Partner who
won't break glass. Call Rodney at 555-8124.
Needed: Homework help. Give me the address
and I'll drop it off for you to do. Call Rodney at 555-8124.
Coming soon! Free performances of the
greatest works of Shakespeare. Call the Harlequin at 555-2387.
Needed: Box mover. Preferably of the Robin
Hood type. Come by Whit's End. Soon preferable to later. See Connie for
details.
Wanted: Editorial assistant to class up the
classified currently lacking in coolness.
This
article originally appeared in "The Odyssey Times," a
special fictional newspaper produced by Focus on the Family to promote
Adventures in Odyssey.
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The Odyssey Times
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